Every year with the WWE, we are forced to sit back and watch them force feed us what they think are the best and worst of the year. And every time, we die a little on the inside. That's why 3 Count Radio started the "SUCK IT" Slammys, to fight back against mediocrity in our wrestling awards shows. No more will John Cena be wrestler of the year, no more will Santino win anything of value. No more! We're Done.
So now, here are the 2012 SUCK IT SLAMMY AWARDS and Winners.
THE DEAN AMBROSE AWARD
(For the Wrestler who hasn't been called up yet that we'll obsess about until he is.)
WINNER. KASSIUS OHNO
2. Bray Wyatt
3. Alex Shelly
THE FUNKY BUTTLOVING AWARD
(For the Rookie of the Year)
WINNER: DAMIEN SANDOW
2. Antonio Cesaro
3. Ryback
THE GREAT KHALI AWARD
(For The Worst Wrestler of the Year Not Named The Great Khali)
WINNER: GARRETT BISCHOFF
2. Tensai
3. The WWE Divas
THE DR.STROKE AWARD
(For the Most Shocking Moment of the Year.
WINNER: SHEAMUS BEATS DANIEL BRYAN IN 18 SECONDS AT WRESTLEMANIA 28
2. Rock Beating Cena at Wrestlemania 28
3.Brock Lesnar No-Selling a 2nd Pedigree and making Triple H Tap Out.
THE WANNA-BEE AWARD
(For the Best T-Shirt Of The Year.)
WINNER: DAMIEN SANDOW: BIRTH OF INTELLECTUALISM
2. Daniel Bryan: NO! NO! NO!
3. CM Punk: In Punk We Trust
THE HIDDEN GEM AWARD
(For The Most Plesant Surprise in Wrestling This Year)
WINNER: ANTONIO CESARO
2. Main Event On ION Television
3. Kane
THE LOST MY SMILE AWARD
(For the Wrestler who started off 2012 Hot but then Ended Up Lame)
WINNER: ZACK RYDER
2. Brodus Clay
3. Brock Lesnar
THE VAL VENIS AWARD
(For the Wrestler who Started off 2012 Flaccid, but then Rose to the Occasion.)
WINNER: DAMIEN SANDOW
2. Tidus O'Neill
3. Kane
THE 3-WAY RAY AWARD
(For the Most Disapointing Thing In Wrestling this Year)
WINNER: DEREK LEAVING 3 COUNT RADIO
2. Jericho's 3rd Run in the WWE
3. Jericho Leaving, Again.
THE ZIPLINE ENTRANCE THAT DIDN'T END IN HORRIBLE TRAGEDY AWARD
(For the best Entrance at Wrestlemania)
WINNER: CM PUNK
2. The Undertaker
3. Daniel Bryan
PROMO OF THE YEAR
WINNER: ANGER MANAGEMENT WITH TEAM FRIENDSHIP AND DR. SHELBY
2. Jericho's Trolling
3. CM Punk's Sobriety Test On Raw
THE "MATT STRYKER" MARK OUT MOMENT OF THE YEAR
WINNER: THE YES CHANTS AT MANIA AND THE NEXT NIGHT'S RAW
2. Dean Ambrose Finally Debuts
3. Punk Turns Heel on RAW 1000
SHOW OF THE YEAR
WINNER: WRESLEMANIA 28
2. Raw 1000
3. Extreme Rules
SPOT OF THE YEAR
WINNER: KOFI KINGSTON'S HANDSTAND AT ROYAL RUMBLE
2. Tensai Throws Dolph Ziggler into the Annoucer Chairs at Money in the Bank
3. Punk Back Superplexes Daniel Bryan through a Table at Money in the Bank
MATCH OF THE YEAR 2012
WINNER: TRIPLE H vs THE UNDERTAKER HELL IN A CELL at WRESTLEMANIA 28
2. CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania 28
3. CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan for the WWE Championship at Over The Limit
THE 3 COUNT RADIO WRESTLER OF THE YEAR AWARD
WINNER: CM PUNK
2. Daniel Bryan
3. Dolph Ziggler
